Sinatra_Z - Awkward Moments

I'm not really shy or worry what others might perceive me when I am overseas or somewhere outside hometown.

There's a Japanese saying that goes "Fear not in embarrassing yourself while travelling, for no one knows you anyway."

Or at least I think it sounds like that,
Got it from Azumanga Daioh so can't really say my source is accurate.

Nonetheless the point that I am trying to make here is that I am not too worried in making mistakes or embarrass myself in front of strangers, after all they don't really know me nor would they remember soon after the incident.

Unless of course I do it in Youtube, but that's a whole other story.

Which is why I have little fear in public speaking,
I mean why worry that you make mistakes?
These are strangers after all and even if you do screw up people will eventually forget about it as life pass by. Trust me they have much more important things to remember. Chances are you might never see them again after this.

As in contrast to...

making mistakes amongst friends, it is much more painful with lasting effects.

Imagine you had a fight with a stranger, a big fight vocal fight with name calling, swearing and heated shouting. A few days later you might forget all about it, after all you don't have to face that "idiot" again after that.

You can always refer to the person as "that idiot" I bumped into on the road one lousy evening.

Now imagine if you had the exact same heated fight with a good friend, a bunch of good friends, family or someone who you personally know. You can't just brush it off that easily, eventually things would be okay with the apology and what not, but that awkward moment will still be there,l hanging in the air especially when the fight is still fresh in mind.

That weird handshake, fake smile and uncomfortable chair. Even the act of drinking or having a discussion in groups would seem very fake. There's that feeling of static air hanging around.

What more when you have to pretend, putting up a facade, that play you do which everything seems to be okay because you're too embarrass to admit that shit happens. Everything back to normal all smiley and giggly yet pissing off and swearing on the drive back home.

Isn't that worse?

Now being rejected by a girl you approached at a bar may hurt your ego a little.
But being rejected by the girl you spent much time together, the company that you enjoy very much over some mindless conversation with coffee is a whole different story.

When that confession didn't work out the way you hoped it would be.

You think that the next coffee conversation will be pleasant?
The thought of being at the same event together would seem weird after that.
Long gone are the things you cherish so much before this.

But hey then again,
To seek love one must be daring enough to take the risk. That's just the way it is.

Hence what is the fear of being rejected in an interview when you compare to the situation above.

why worry so much about embarassing yourself in front of strangers?
People who you don't really care so much about nor do they care much about you.
Just get up on that stage, do your best and just be yourself.
Give it your best shot and might as well do what you feel like doing.
I mean, think....
What have you got to lose anyway?

Life is simply to short to be worrying about what others might think.

Sinatra_Z - Monday poetry to cheer your day

Oh comes one night when the full moon glow,
two eyes shall vonder and hunger follow,
with vone(one) hand carry a candle glow,
with teeth and fangs sharper than arrow.

Ven time shall come for it to happen,
I vill eat your pesky children,
their tender meat make very good stew,
their soft bones ahh vonderful chew,
Vhen dark descends and full moon reborn,
for I shall lurk and children begone!
Beware-beware of the evil stare,
fear oh fear for the evil grinch is here.....

Sinatra_Z - Of Analogies and Examples

Working in the technical side occasionally you have to explain things to people.
And technical people generally would agree when I say sometimes this is somewhat of a problem.

This is where Analogy comes in.

Analogy is when you give an example or another situation in which your listener can easily relate to.

Which is why they usually say smart students don't really make good teachers, dumb students make good teachers because they know what it's like to not understand.

A few years back in campus when I was in the computer club, a Business student, girl, asked me a question on the internet and her computer. She inquired that if she buys a good computer will it have an effect when she surf's the internet?

My answer was Yes and No,
if you work with Engineers you will find these answers abundantly. Engineers usually answer something like this

Yes but.... Well it depends..... That is somewhat correct..... Depending on.... You could say it that way
followed by a very long explanation. At at this time the boss would usually wish for a "Yes Man".

Back to the topic, knowing that she has absolutely no IT background whatsoever I used this analogy.

"Now Imagine that your computer is a Car and the Internet is a highway."


"Now would there be a difference between driving a Ferarri and a Kancil on a highway heading from JB to KL?"

"Yeah of course, Ferarri would be much quicker."

"Exactly, now would there be any difference between a Ferarri and a Kancil in Federal Highway heading for Shah Alam at 8.30 on a monday morning?"


"Of course there is a difference between a Kancil and a Ferrari but no point if the road you use sucks, the same with computers and the internet. Plus what's the point of buying a Ferrari if you're going to drive at the speed of 70 kmph most of the time. So buy a standard computer and pray that the Internet line do not screw you up."

However the best analogy or example that I have ever encountered did not come in the form of explaining technical situations, although it did came from an Engineer, it was about trying to explain about the birds and the bees.

"Alaa perempuan la best diorang rasa lagi seronok bila ko buat, kita yang kena kerja dia duduk je lepas tu rasa best."

"Eh bukan lelaki ke rasa lagi best, sebab kita confirm orgasm punya."

"Hak elah aku dah kahwin ko belum aku la lagi tahu."

" ye ke?"

"Ok aku bagi ko contoh lah kasi ko senang nampak."


"Bila ko korek telinga mana lagi best, jari ke telinga?"


Malam ni malam Jumaat.

Selamat Malam...

Sinatra_Z - UMNO dan Zaidel

OKT 21 — Pernah satu ketika dahulu ada kawan bertanyakan sebuah soalan cepumas kepada saya “Zaidel, awak tak nampak macam seseorang yang bersifat perkauman? Kenapa awak boleh masuk Umno?” Maka dengan tenang saya melihat kea rah muka kawan saya dan berkata “Awak tak nampak macam seseorang yang bodoh, kenapa awak masuk PKR?”

Jangan marah ye kawan-kawan yang merupakan ahli PKR, saya bukan cuba untuk mengutuk, cuma saya hedak menyatakan suatu pandangan melalui sindiran terhadap soalan kawan saya tadi.

Sinatra_Z - Fate

My siblings both are in the banking industry,
my dad was a pilot and my mother, a kindergarten teacher.

Now how in the world did I get here?

We're supposed to believe in fate, that some things has already been written, way beyond of our control. Like death or natural disaster.

Some say that everyone has a destination,
written long before they were born, in which they call fate. Like of princes rise up to become king, born into their destiny, written and ready. That we are all to a certain extent are like clouds, drifting at the mercy and direction of the wind. Thus rather than fight the wind we should make the best out of it.

The thing is,
some people tend to blame everything on fate, what's the point of doing anything if if is already written. Once can simply say that I am poor today because it is written that I shall and will be poor long before I was born.

I mean who want's to be born in Somalia no?

I don't really know to tell you the truth,
rather than giving you an answer id rather give you a perspective. I would like to think that in a way, like the clouds our path is determined by the flow of the wind. But unlike the clouds we do have somewhat control over which wind or direction which we are heading. I'd like to think that life is more like a sailing ship, though at the mercy of the wind the captain has the ability, power and choice to choose which way he/she want's to sail.

And like any sailor,
only those who are brave and daring enough venture deep into the ocean in search of a great adventures and bountiful land.

Yet many of those who are brave and daring did not come back.

For amongst the brave and daring,
only those who are wise, knowledgeable yet humble enough to respect and understand the nature of the sea (plus a little bit of luck) can arrive at their far away destiny and return to tell their story.

I think life is something like that.

So feel free to sail where ever you wish to go,
Be brave and daring, learn from other people's experience, seek knowledge, chart your map and always-always remember to be humble.

God Willing - Insyallah

I'll see you if you get there... You'll see me if I get there.

Sinatra_Z - Weekends

Favourite Weekend Activity

Just Chill....

Get me?

Sinatra_Z - An Observation and some Haikus

this tiny obsession of mine with my Camera,

is beginning to take a toll,

on my writing....


Here are some Haiku for you folks

Not easy to divulge,
deep dark matters,
ahhh it's out, Flush....

Can't buy love,
So Rent It.

teet-teet teet-teet,
smile giggle,
her sms made my day.

Even if,
there's more hours in a day,
I'd still be late for work.

Kopi O Ais kurang manis satu,

Pejuang Marhaen,
Gelaran diberi sendiri,
Menentang musuh dalam mimpi...

Membaca Sajak,
yang penting gaya,
makna belakang cerita. (orang bukan faham pun, tapi tepuk jugak)

Menulis sajak keindahan alam sekitar,
sambil menghisap rokok,
dan membuang puntung di tepi longkang.

Kenapa sibuk,
nak kulit putih,
hitam kan manis...

Tak tipu,
tak percaya?
Tanya R Azmi.

Sinatra_Z - Perempuan (Siri I)

If there is anything that I have not much credibility to talk about it's Women. Trust me, I don't really have much experience when it comes to them never really was or is a Ladies Man..

Most of the things that I learn from women comes from men, self proclaimed Casanova's or women behaviour experts who are usually older than me, guess what, their explanation makes much more sense as oppose to asking women themselves. That and their stories are very-very interesting. So here I share with some of the things I pick up in conversations. Check it out, might be something interesting.

First Chapter

Why Women fall for Married Man.

It all started when there are several cases known to public of women with money, beauty and career fall for unavailable men. Made me wonder as this breaks the stereotype of women going for unavailable men who is usually older because of money and I notice that Malay women have more tendency for this probably due to the polygamy factor. But still makes you wonder why this beautiful women with stable finance don't go find someone single when it's obvious they can.

The discussion started when a friend of mine started telling me stuff and showing me his messages.he commented that ever since he got married, he is more attractive to the ladies, much-much than before. Dude started showing me a bunch of sms's from women, tons of em, few even wanted to settle down/elope/get married or whatever.

After some discussion about it a friend concluded (he is married as well) that women tend to view married men as safe, so they feel comfortable to talk about their problems, feelings and whatever they feel the need to divulge. And as time goes by and more and more things are shared and talked about, things more from being acquaintances to a friend, from a friend to a best friend and from a best friend to a friend with benefits and finally to the love of my life.

The good thing about married men is that they are not as horny as their single counterparts. They are also much more patient, understanding and a much better listener. They already have someone warm in bed so this talk and sms are more like a sort of hobby one could say unlike their impatient single comrades who just don't have the time for foreplay (in terms or relationship) and more towards hunting.

Then another friend who is a self proclaimed expert in human behaviour came up with something else.

He said your usual goody two shoes Malay Male is something like this.
He studied hard in school and get good results. Then he goes into a good college/university and study even harder because it's a good degree. There he met a girl, his first girlfriend, the same Uni, acquaintance or whatever. They dated each other and he gets excited brings he home to see his mother. Mother likes her because she is a nice good girl (like him) said that she could be a good wife. Our friend than graduated starts his first job, gather enough funds, get married and have 2 kids before they are 30.


Then after 30, our friend get's giddy and starts some messy affairs and your usual story.

So this friend said that our friend here before never really knew much about women, but once he is married and have extensive knowledge what what women want, how to treat them and know what they want to listen. These men know what women wants and he said that's the reason why they seem more attractive. Plus the fact that now our friend are much more excited in this adventurous affair as oppose to the nice girl that you bring home to see mom, this one is much-much more tempting.

It's the usual "abang adik angkat" that turns into "abang angkat adik".

The thing is Married men are stable, they know what women want and how to treat them well and Men are at their prime not when they are in their 20's but when they are in their late 30's and 40's. So of course given by that logic they are an excellent catch.

A female friend even said this as she observed this lady who is a mistress to this rich businessman.
"at first she does it for the money, then when she learn more and more about him, and as successful man they usually have great personality/virtue she starts to fall in love with him. Then slowly she turns into this women who will always long for the time and day that will never come where he will bring her to official functions and his kids will call her mother. Notice how things turn."

Baffling no?

I mean come on, even a beautiful actress with material possessions can fall for a married man with 5 kids. Ustaz or no Ustaz, Ana or Ente in the end he is just a man. Having a beard, pray five times a day and wearing a kopiah is no guarantee I tell you.

So Good Luck folks.

a pointer,

always........ always... quietly check his sms. You can never be sure.


If he has something to hide, trust me it's not about work.

Good Night Folks.

Sinatra_Z - Facebookakke

OCT 8 — First and foremost I would like to wish everyone out there Selamat Hari Raya Aildilfitri and Maaf Zahir Batin if any of my articles offended you in any way. Now that we have done the obligatory greeting and apology, let’s start offending each other again and repeat the whole process next year.
If you noticed, the title is actually a word play (captain obvious) and it is a combination of two words, which are “Facebook” and “Bukakke”. Facebook is an online social network website which is hugely popular on the Internet these days

Sinatra_Z - A metaphor and a conclusion

I saw a movie, or at least a clip of a movie.
Can't remember what it's called but this Englishman was talking to this American fellow and he was trying to persuade this man to do something. I'm not sure what but it seems that the American feels that it's something too late for him, that it was lost.

So the Englishman said..
"I lost my keys a few years back and ever since my door has been unlocked."

I like that sentence,
It's a metaphor on life. On how at first he lost his keys, a tool in which he controls on what and when comes in and goes out, now his door is always unlocked, hence letting in many things into his life which was previously blocked.

In a way losing something like the "key" actually made his life richer.

It made me wonder about the term 'the key to my heart' or 'how she/he holds the key to my heart'. You see sometimes we fall for someone really hard, or really deep that when things are over it's really hard to recover and that we feel a part of us is gone. How that person takes with them a part of our heart or mind and most of the times they just don't realise it.

So one could say now that person now is gone and with him/her are the keys to your heart. Corny no? But it is quite true. Trust me I really dislike thinking/discussing in this light but like it or not we as human beings with feelings just can't help it. So might as well write about it. That person who we thought was everything turn out to be not what hope to be, it happens right.

So when the key to our heart is lost hence the door is shut, thus one usually say it's really hard to fall once more or to open it up again. For some people it's just about eating several buckets of ice cream and crying, some become a workaholic while few (and I have seen this) though don't really admit it just don't trust the opposite sex anymore. Since the key is gone thus the door can't be open, takes someone special or really special to open it back (or a keymaker according to matrix).

You could look it that way,
or like the Englishman earlier on you can simply say that

"Ever since the key to my heart is lost, it has been unlocked ever since."

Think about it, you spent years obsessing about this person, devoting time, energy, money and many more to the fact that your heart is only opened to that one person because only he/she holds the key, that special one. But now since the key is gone, and the door is unlocked, anyone can come and visit be it a friend, someone interesting, a person with a funny accent or just whoever drops by. Now isn't that a nice thought.

Of course,
It is easier said than done. I mean come on you just got you heart broken and trying to get up feeling all preppy and optimistic is quite hard to do. But this is something that isn't supposed to make you feel better immediately instead it is something that you can think about as your conclusion. The time when you are done with all the drama and emotional things that this would be the conclusion of your whole fiasco. Another way of looking at everything, as oppose to the other ending.

It's just a simple logical deduction I made before I went out today while walking in front of the TV. It has got absolutely nothing to do with any recent events, trust me! So don't come and post on my wall about me with broken heart or all that jack shit.

But the conclusion is pretty neat no?

We all have our moments like that. Let's move on with a positive start then.

I feel a slight of regret though,

If only I realised this years before, long ago.
Perhaps, things would have been very different today.

A friend once told me that I am very extrovert when it comes to thinking but not when it comes to, well, It rhymes with thinking.

let's just say, tonight I have just realised that I lost my keyes.

Good Night Folks.

Sinatra_Z - Menolak Satu Sekalipun maka Kafir

Saya ada terfikir lah,
dulu rasanya pernah dengar Pemimpin PAS ada mengatakan kalau menolak satu pun Hukum Islam maka jatuhlah ianya kafir.

Maka atas sebab BN menolak hukum Hudud PAS maka orang UMNO pun kafirlah mereka. Kerana tidak yakin dan tidak mengikut sunah nabi yang melaksanakan Hukum Syariah.

Jadi ini membuat saya terfikir.

Selain dari Hudud Nabi muhammad juga mengamalkan pemilihan pemimpin melalui kaedah dan sistem Syura bukan?

Asas undang-undang adalah Hudud dan Pemilihan Ketua adalah Syura ketika itu.

Jadi PAS yang memilih Presiden melalui sistem demokrasi perwakilan ala-ala barat sama seperti UMNO/MCA dan Sebagainya, bukankah telah menolak sistem Syura.

Hassan Ali pernah menyatakan kenapa tidak dibuat sistem Syura dalam muktamar PAS.

Jadi apakah kini PAS yang telah menolak sistem Politik Zaman Nabi Muhammad juga telah menjadi Kafir?

Bagaiamana pula dengan Saudi Arabia yang mengamalkan sistem Monarki yang langsung bercanggah dengan Islam? Adakah Mereka juga Kafir?

Empayar Uthmaniah? Abbasiyyah? Adakah mereka juga Kafir kerana telah menolak pemerintahan seperti nabi Muhammad iaitu Syura?

Adakah orang-orang di Indonesia, Pakistan, Iraq, Syria, Lebanon, Mesir, Albania, Brunei dan sebagainya yang mempunyai sistem mahkamah tidak seperti hudud juga semuanya adalah Kafir?

Macamana lah tu bang....

Lagi satu,
dikatakan Hukum Hudud hanya akan dilaksanakan pada orang Islam. Mengapa mempunyai dua sistem undang-undang untuk orang Islam atau bukan Islam. Adakah mereka tidak yakin yang Hudud itu tidak mampu berlaku adil kepada orang bukan Islam. Bukankah sepatutnya hukum hudud itu sepatutnya sesuai untuk semua manusia?